Transforming Your Reality: How to Create a Life Aligned with Your True Values

I’ve got a bone to pick. It’s become a pet peeve of mine when someone says, “Time to get back to reality!”

As if whatever you were just experiencing WAS NOT real.

This is often the case when you’ve been on vacation. Everything seems so much easier – almost like a dream.

And then your inner judge steps in a says, “Welp, that was too good to be your reality. May as well start grieving now. Life could never feel this way on the regular.”

I’ve CERTAINLY done this to myself in the past and have even been brought to tears thinking about the polar opposite “reality” I was going back to.

It was at its worst when I was at the height of my work addiction, and I was consumed by achievement.

Getting “back to reality” after time off from the holidays or a disconnected vacation was like getting whiplash from all the work I had to catch up on and how behind I felt – basically wiping out all the rejuvenation I had gotten from time away.

You feel me? 

There were times when I literally told myself there was no point in going away because it wasn’t worth the cost of preparing to be off and then catching up when I returned.

Looking back at that time, I feel for that high-achiever who was totally driven by other people’s values.

Today, I can honor the massive healing it took to rebuild my relationship to “back to reality”.

(Our tiny home aka our “glass cocoon“)

“Guess it’s back to reality” is something people often say to me when I’m coming back to Baltimore from our tiny home out west.

When people see pictures of our breathtaking views, get a taste for its solitude and learn that we don’t have internet or cell reception, a lot of stories start to form in their minds about what that means about us.

Whether they think that sounds like a nightmare or it’s a total dream.

Whether they think we’re nuts or think we’re geniuses.

Whether they think it’s impossible to run a business out here or they think we’re destined to succeed.

A lot of people think that living this homesteader cowgirl way after a lifetime of being a power couple in the city is just not realistic.

And lemme tell ya, I used to think so too! we did not wake up like this.

It’s been years of healing. Rewiring. And grounding in our authentic core values that made this an actual reality.

And if you’re willing to listen to your wisdom, you can do that too. In whatever reality reflects your values. And not giving a shit if anyone else approves.

Now, when someone tells me it’s time to get back to reality, I smile and say, “I’m so grateful for the journey it took to make this my reality.”

What part of your reality do you want to change?

Ask yourself these questions to learn more about what you can do to start your journey to alignment.

• What triggers you when you’re coming back from a rejuvenating time away?

  Who or what feels like the most abrupt shift in your energy when you get back? Are there any themes on the types or sources of your triggers? What boundaries might you set for yourself proactively next time? For me, it was always my workload, and it felt like there was so much to catch up on. Over time, I learned to give myself 2-3 days for protected “catch-up blocks” before I scheduled anything else. That way, I planned in time to ease back into things. Another habit hack? I’d often come back on a Thursday, so I only had a couple of days in the office to catch up on things before the weekend. Mondays already gave me stress, so this was a great example of meeting myself where I was, not where I wanted to be.

• What geographic location makes you feel the most at ease?

  Where do you sleep the best? Is there a specific connection to nature (like beaches, mountains, or deserts) that brings you peace? What parts of that can you bring into your reality now? We have a wall-sized mountainscape mural in our office so we can feel that energy when we’re in Baltimore.

(our office in Baltimore)

• Which of your core values makes you feel the most grounded?

  When you reflect on when you’ve felt the most inner harmony, where were you? What were you doing? And how might you realistically activate your core values in your daily experience? Unity with nature is what gives me the greatest sense of well-being. So, it’s no surprise that a tiny home in the mountains makes me feel so aligned. And I totally get that it doesn’t do that for other people. That’s because, like you, they have their unique values!

Check out our free core values quiz to know yours.

I’d love to hear from you.

What do you want to change in your reality?

I’ll share more practical tips and tools that might serve you in creating more inner harmony.

When you are ready, here are three ways I can help you.

Permission to Be Human: This book is my step-by-step guide to creating a thriving business by knowing, owning, and living your core values. Check out my #1 Bestseller in Amazon’s Workplace Culture Category Here.

Knowing and Living Your Values: During my 10-day course, you’ll identify your unique values, see where you’re currently activating them, and make small tweaks where you’re not so that every day is filled with purpose. Join 7,000+ Students Here.

Alignment Coaching: Work with me 1×1 to align with your core values, reduce stress, and ignite more well-being without compromising your impact. Fill out this inquiry form to see if we’re a good fit for one another.